Orleans Weekly Journal
Published: Friday, January 4, 2008 

Mr. Mom goes back to the office

Do you remember Mr. Mom, the 1983 comedy-drama starring Michael Keaton and Teri Garr? Jack Butler (played by Keaton) and his wife Caroline (played by Garr) portray a typical middle-class family in suburban Detroit when Jack loses his job as an automotive engineer, Caroline then gets a job with an ad agency and Jack stays at home to raise their two kids, Kenny and Megan. Laughs, bedlam and confusion ensue … “Kenny, don’t paint your sister!” Even if you didn’t see the movie, you get the picture.

Since leaving the mayor’s office last July, this local scribe has starred in his own tamer version of Mr. Mom/Monsieur Maman. It has been a six-month eye opener for sure.

On the positive side, it’s great to grocery shop during the middle of the day; no agonizing waits at the cold cuts counter, the best selection of fresh fruits and veggies and a quick zip through the checkout line. Ditto for hitting the Tim’s drive-thru to feed that mid-morning caffeine craving … “large with two milks please” in, out, no fuss, no muss.

If you’re hungry, a quick trip to the LCBO for some cheese and crackers nibbly-type stuff along with a taste (just a taste to be sure) of some new Irish Cream or California red-blend. Hey, it would have been very rude of me just to take the food!

Next up the Innes Road Superstore: wow, it’s massive. But here’s a tip, if you’re going to browse the kitchen section, take a gander at their magazine rack or mull about the electronic games area for an hour, it’s best to do this before jamming your cart with frozen foods. And if you picked up that melted ice cream that I re-stocked in the freezer, sorry about that. Look me up in the summer and I’ll buy you an Oreo blizzard at the DQ.

Don’t get the wrong impression, being Mr. Mom is hard work. Keeping the professional network primed was important and an hour per day on the phone, PC, and Blackberry along with trips to the gym five days per week ensured that a schedule was maintained.

As well I had to keep the synapses between nerve endings upstairs firing on all cylinders. So I watched free educational TV each afternoon. The GSN network (Cable 287) offers informative and classic learning with easily digestible half-hour modules including Card Sharks (probability theory), Super Password (spelling and diction), and Family Feud (a blend of pop culture knowledge with a sociological overview of the modern family).

But next week it’s back to the office grind. I hope the office has a couch for my new found habit of the 1:18 pm power snooze for 20 minutes. Now if you’ll excuse me, this Mr. Mom needs to make dinner for the family. Now where did I put those take-out fliers?